Parents: Leading is better than Sending

 Read Titus 2

Here we go again, more directions to follow.

Teach the older men to stay on an even keel, living lives worthy of respect. Teach them to use the sound mind that God gave them.  Challenge them to stay the course and to press on towards a godly life.

Teach the older women to be respectful and mindful of what they say. I’m sure that gossip thrived as much two millennia ago as it does now. The whole like and share business was just a little more complicated.

Teach them to watch what they drink and to be good examples to their children. Children need to see a godly model of marriage in the home.

We will talk more about children in a moment. These seem like sensible guidance for all mankind. Let’s move it along. Next chapter.

What’s new here?

These sound like sensible instructions to people who had been pagans and who had tried to please false gods These might be good instructions for someone wondering if there was a God.

But these were Cretans! You have heard the term. Well, Paul left Titus on Crete to minister to these new believers. They were, as Paul said:

They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.

Paul was essentially telling Titus that this is the worst duty station ever, and it’s all yours. Get these Cretans in shape so they can run their race of faith.

OBTW—Suck it up buttercup.

So you didn’t get left in Ephesus, Philippi, or even among the pagan philosophers in Athens. You are not on the short list for that opening in Honolulu.

Crete! Are you kidding me?

Can you think of a time where God sent his people into a land of g odlessness and depravity? Sure you can.

The Promised Land was a gift, but it was full of godless people with godless practices.  How did God address this? He sent the law via Moses and he drove out the armies of the godless occupants of the land. If they stayed to fight, they died.

If you have read the laws in Leviticus 18, you might wonder, “Did God really have to tell us that?”

His answer was that the people in the land now have done all of these things and they disgust me. You are to be holy as your God is holy.

So Joshua was sent into the Promised Land to drive out its pagan residents. He was to leave nobody untouched. If they ran away, they might live. If they remained, they would die.

Joshua never balked at the task given to him. He was the choose this day guy and his choice was clear. He would serve the Lord. We saw a glimpse of this when Moses sent the spies into the land.

Joshua and Caleb were ready to take the land by the power of God. Ten other men on the same reconnaissance mission saw an enemy too great for them to defeat.

No matter what the obstacle before us, the God inside of us is much greater. Now back to Crete and Titus.

The adults on this island have gone beyond rough edges and they are a challenge, but you can reach their children even if the adults act like a bunch of Cretans.

Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.

So, men and women together, live wholesome lives. Be good examples. Practice self-control. Make temperate language your lexicon.

Then you will be in good shape to bring up a child in the way he or she should go. Do you want victory in your community?

Live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be a good example. Bring up kids the right way. That’s about as straightforward as it gets and it embraces the full biblical witness.

So, suck it up, buttercup, and lead those Cretans into Christian living. Good advice for two millennia ago but does it mean anything here and now?  Come on, we don’t live in a community of Cretans, do we?

How would I know?

Here’s one of my indicators. About 20-30 times a year, someone calls me and asks if we help with power bills or water bills or some other expense.

I tell them that for those who don’t have a church family, we send money through the Ministerial Alliance to the Western Oklahoma Family Care Center for those purposes.

Sometimes the answer I get is that my kids go to that church.

They do not have the dissonance that should accompany that statement. Their minds should be conflicted.

I don’t gather to worship God but I do send my kids.

The whole don’t stop gathering together business doesn’t register. This should be a conflict in the minds of one who says they follow God.

Paul told Titus: They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. I can think of anything more 2024 America than that statement.

They claim to know God but you would never know by looking at ‘em.

We have been down the vending machine road a few times in connection with several topics.  That’s too transactional. I came up with the metaphor and targeted my writing on the transactional and transformational nature of our actions to faithful believers.

Eventually, I wrote a couple things to the parents. I have put out something like this for the past several years.

Dear Mom or Dear Dad,

 

I want you to know how much I enjoy going to church.  Really, I don’t go to church.  I am a part of the church.  The church is that group of people who follow Jesus.  I learned that and like it.

I wanted to say thank you for letting me go.  I will probably go a few more years before I stop.  It’s not a thing that older people do.  It can’t be for real or you would go too, but it’s fun for now.

 

I believe in God and in Jesus and that he died to take away my sins, but that can’t mean too much or you would lead me to worship him.  It can’t be that important.

 

We make it to most of the ball games and town events and never miss a weekend of bingeing on movies.  We go to the lake and never miss a game on the big screen.  If this worshiping God was important, we would do that too.  I trust you that it can’t be that important.  I trust you!

 

I know that your life is tough, and you are tired most of the time.  I guess that is what I will be soon, once I stop this Jesus stuff.  Really, what’s the point.  You have your reasons not to go.  I will just use your reasons in a few years.  I will be just like you.

 

I really enjoy the Christmas presents and other cool stuff that you get me, but all of that stuff just wears out over time.  They tell me that Jesus wants us to live forever with him.  I wish that were true, but I’m sticking with you and not buying this God loves me stuff.

 

I will keep going to worship and classes for now so you can have a break, but don’t worry.  One day I will be just like you and skip all of this God is love nonsense.  I know it can’t be true.  You tell me that you love me and these church folks tell me that God loves me.  I want to believe but I won’t betray you.  I will be just like you and start making my list of reasons not to give up my Sunday mornings to worship God.

 

Don’t worry.  One day I will have a standing list of reasons at the ready as to why I can’t go or participate or serve God in any way.  I may take some of those excuses and expand them for work when I have a job or for my own kids to use at school when some teacher challenges them to be their best.  Don’t worry, I will be faithful to what you have taught me.

 

Just to make sure that I don't backslide into the ways of the church, I will criticize those who beckon me to come and worship the Lord or challenge people to respond to God's grace by love and obedience.  I won't fall into that trap.  I will stay on the sidelines with you and fight to remain apathetic and ambivalent about life. Maybe, I will become fatalistic and hopeless and more self-centered so I am not tempted to return to following Jesus.

 

Santa, the Easter Bunny, and even the Tooth Fairy got benched eventually. Jesus can join them soon enough. I know this is kid stuff, but…

 

If you don’t mind, I would like to keep going for a little while longer.  These people who are the church are always kind and loving to me.  They smile when they see me.  Most give me a hug.  They know what God says about just about everything.  They actually believe what God says.  It’s really cool stuff, but don’t worry, I won’t let you down.  I will stay away and be content in my reasons for not going soon enough.

 

I want to be just like you.

 

Love, Your Kid.

 

I’m just talking about gathering for worship. I haven’t even mentioned the tithe, the power of believers gathered in prayer, or iron sharpening iron—one believer sharpening another as we follow the Lord.

 

Taking the yoke of our Master , learning from him, and putting his words into practice are still a bridge too far at the moment.

 

I’m just talking about getting parents to lead their children to worship. It might seem like I am spending a lot of time on one thing. But in this build your own god world, knowing the one True God is important. Coming to worship him is even more important.

 

So, why do I need to know what you are telling the lost and disconnected? Because they need to hear it from you as well.

 

They expect it from me, but when you say this is important, it’s a different sort of endorsement.

 

People expect the preacher to preach.  They expect him to teach. They expect him to say what he says even if they don’t want to hear it.

 

The preacher is the one whom you expect to know the Bible. You expect him to study and pray and teach and more.

 

But when you say it is important, it takes on a different value. You add the value of personal experience. You are navigating the world and trying very hard to do it God’s way.

 

You value your children and are committed to making sure they are brought up in the way they should go.

 

Most of you have a secular workplace and navigate your employment seeking to keep God first in your life.

 

You get it! Our conduct and example are important. We believe. We want to follow Jesus. We want our children to know the Lord and the abundant life he has in store for us.

 

Now, share it.  Share with those whom we do not see that seeing them with their children on Sunday mornings or Wednesday evenings is important. Leading your children to worship is important.

 

THIS IS IMPORTANT!

 

So many people who come seeking financial help tell me that they would do anything for their babies. I get some get me away from this guy looks when I respond, “Would you lead them to God? Would you lead them to worship? Would you lead them to serve the Lord and obey him?

 

There is a difference in directing and leading. There is a difference between sending and leading.

 

I was blessed to have served as a commissioned officer of United States Marines for over 20 years. I only needed to know 5 words.  They were: Take the hill!

 

All of that time in college and all I really needed to know was 5 words. Some of the more analytical and mathematical types are thinking, that’s only 3 words, but are not sure if they should say anything or not. That’s how you get roped into singing a special or filling the pulpit.

 

Yes, that was only 3 of the 5 words. The other 2 are the most important.

 

Follow Me!

 

Leadership by example is the best form of leadership. We need to practice this in how we live. We should be excellent examples.

 

We should be the model for bringing up a child in the way he or she should go.

 

We should be telling everyone that their relationship with God matters. Obeying God matters. Taking his yoke matters. Putting his words into practice matters.

 

There is a lot to being a faithful disciple but some people just need to get started by gathering together as believer on a regular basis.

 

So many need to lead their families to the Lord.

 

How do we do this?

 

Not by pointing a finger of condemnation and judgment, but by extending our arms in invitation.

 

We invite because we are commissioned to, but also because our hearts compel us to tell others this is important.

 

I’m talking mostly to men, but also to all the adults in the household, when I say lead your children to worship and service and abundant life.

 

Teach your children to grow in the grace of God.

 

One of the most important things we who have brought children into the world or taken on the role of parent via another route is to lead your children to God through Christ.

 

Teach them to love, obey, honor, worship, and serve, God by proclaiming Jesus is Lord and following him as his disciple.

 

This is important!

 

The world says to gratify yourselves. God’s word says to love God, please God, worship God, serve God, Obey God, and put the words of our Master into practice.

 

There is joy in living a life that brings glory to God’s name. The world does not want you to know this.  We are to love God, serve God, obey God

 

I have heard most of the excuses for not being able to do this. I started numbering them. I am up to 2234 as of the end of August.

 

How do I respond to all of those excuses?  It’s usually a one size fits all.

 

We do what’s important to us.

 

We do what is important to us.  If it is important to us, we will find a way.

 

If you want that ticket to this year’s Super Bowl. You will find a way to score the ticket.

 

If you need extra memory for the video games that you play on your computer. You will find a way to get the extra RAM chips.

 

If you really need that extra tat on your arm, you will find a way to get inked.

 

If you really will do anything for your children, then do it. Start by leading them to God through Jesus and then get them to worship, Christian education, serving others in love, obeying the one true God, and choosing to follow Jesus in response to God’s love, then do these things.

 

Start with coming to worship, then education, then service, and then you are on your way to the joy of the Lord.

 

These are important. Now make them important to you. That’s how simple our message is.

 

We don’t have to take the hill. Jesus did that for us, but we are called to follow Jesus. We are called to make disciples.

 

We are to tell others to follow us to the One that they will want to follow for all of their years. Just sending your kids tells them that this worship stuff is not important to you.

 

God is good. God is love. God loves you. God has good plans for you.

 

God wants to see you leading your family to worship week after week. He wants to see you and all who call upon his name in this community in a house of worship on Sundays, Wednesdays, or whenever the body is gathered to worship and serve God.

 

This is our message and it is important!

 

Amen.