The Prudent Overlook an Insult

 

Read Proverbs 12

I’m jumping ahead a few chapters to get to one of my favorite verses.

As iron sharpens iron,

    so one person sharpens another.

Why couldn’t I wait?  It is good company for a coupling of verses we find in this twelfth chapter. This chapter poses the dichotomy of the wise and the foolish once again.

The way of fools seems right to them,

    but the wise listen to advice.

Fools show their annoyance at once,

    but the prudent overlook an insult.

As we continue in the Proverbs, so too the counsel continues.

Do not answer a fool according to his folly,

    or you yourself will be just like him.

So the topic of this short message is…

FACEBOOK and other online traps.

There is value in discussion, even argument, between people who seek God and his kingdom and his righteousness and surely his wisdom.  Discourse between and among godly people, who are seeking not only the best solution for a problem but personal growth, is valuable.

We help each other grow in intelligent discourse.  Civil discourse is good discussion and a fertile ground for growth.  We who belong to Christ Jesus are blessed to grow in his grace.  That means that we can make mistakes and he will never kick us to the curb.

God already took into account our brilliance and our stupidity when he claimed us as his own. He did tell us through Solomon that some things just don’t help us grow.  Arguing with a fool is one of those things.

This seems harsh, to pass on a discussion because we consider someone to be a fool.  Are we not counseled to avoid calling someone a fool?

We are, but we are also counseled not to engage a fool.  How do we know if we have encountered a fool?  Here are two indicators that Solomon saw fit to share.

First, the fool always thinks that he is right.  His way always seems right to him.  That’s just human nature.  Our way seems right to us, but we who seek wisdom will listen to counsel—especially godly counsel—and are not married to our way.

Second, the fool is annoyed immediately when someone disagrees with him.  Do you remember quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger? The fool is upset as his first course of action.  He is primed to respond. He is quick to answer and with anger.  Listening gets in the way.

Our counsel is, scroll on—let it go. There is no profit to be had here.  Any fruit that comes from further engagement will be rotten.  Move on.

But, but, but…I can’t leave it alone.  You don’t know what he just said. 

The prudent overlook an insult.

Long ago and not too far away, I was a Leadership for Life instructor for The Oklahoman.  For all of the games they played with circulation numbers, they did try to do some positive things.  One of them was the Leadership for Life program.

One afternoon, the company had arranged for Sherri Coale to come and speak to the instructors.  I figured it was worth the drive to the Edmond office and I didn’t even wear my OSU tie.

Sherri talked about many things but her best anecdote was from when she was a new high school basketball coach.  There was one man who always gave her flak regardless of what she did.  He would argue anything, anytime, and anywhere.

Sherri said the thought of what he would confront her with next darkened every day whether she saw him or not.  She finally went to one of the more experienced coaches and shared what was happening.

The older coach told her concisely, Don’t wrestle with the pigs.  You will both get muddy, but the pigs love it.

The prudent overlook an insult.

This was solid counsel that I am sure Sherri kept with her all of her years.  We followed the OU girls for a while, went to see them in a regional tournament at whatever the basketball arena is called now, and enjoyed watching Sherri coach.

I thought she was a good coach but could only shake my head at the commentators when the Sooner girls didn’t get the win.  The talking heads started talking about what heels she wore for the game and maybe she should have paid more attention to coaching.

The prudent overlook an insult.

You have purposeful things to do with your life.  Wasting time arguing with someone—even someone who insults you or your position on something or which heels your decided to wear today—someone who will neither listen nor consider your thoughts is a waste of time.  Chances are that the other person gets entertainment value out of wasting your time.

You have purposeful things to do.

I don’t avoid going online.  Sometimes I am very provocative, but I pick my conversation partners carefully.

The careful use of provocation can lead to creativity but the foolish are only annoyed by thoughts that engage the mind.

You have purposeful things to do.  Your time is wasted, not invested, in arguing with a fool.  There is no, Well done good and faithful servant at the end of an argument with a fool.

I love a good discussion.  I enjoy civil discourse.  If you find a partner who is quick to listen then you are blessed, especially in this age of insults.  Those folks are one in a million. 

Most people don’t discuss.  They degrade.  Discussion takes work.  Put-downs come easy.

You have purposeful things to do.

The prudent overlook an insult.

You have purposeful things to do.

Amen.