But My Sister is My Wife

 Read Genesis 20

Be faithful.  Walk blamelessly before the Lord.  This was the counsel of God to Abraham.

We know that it is not possible for us to truly be blameless on our own.  We need the atonement of Christ Jesus to put us in right standing—blameless—in our relationship with God.

We really couldn’t expect Abraham to live a life without transgression, but really, trying to pass your wife off as your sister again should have been a lesson that Abraham already learned.

But we see this behavior repeated.  Abraham moved to the southwest to an area called the Negev.  It was between Kadesh and Shur.  It was also north of Paran.  Paran was where Moses stopped and sent 12 spies into the Promised Land centuries later.

This was also the land of the Philistines, though the animosity between the Philistines and Israel was centuries down the road.

Essentially, Abraham had moved closer to Egypt. When Abraham settled into a place called Gerar, he informed people that Sarah was his sister. The king of that area—Abimelech—took Sarah for his own household.

This must attest to Sarah’s good looks.  The king took a 90-year-old woman into his own household.  Essentially, she would be another wife or a concubine. If we think about this and this account is chronological, it must have happened very soon after the destruction of Sodom.

Had Sarah been showing that she was with child, Abraham would have had to come up with a cover story as to why his sister was pregnant.  Really, what king rounds up pregnant women for his palace?

Abimelech did not have sexual relations with Sarah.  God prevented this, but there were consequences for bringing her into his household. All of the women in Abimelech’s household were prevented from conceiving children.

Abimelech might have been oblivious to what was going on and why except for the fact that God came to him in a dream.  God was very direct.

“You are as good as dead because of the woman you have taken; she is a married woman.”

Abimelech appealed to God.  I didn’t know. Abraham said she was his siter.  Sarah said he was her brother.  I didn’t knowingly do anything wrong.  In fact, I never touched her.

God replied in the dream.

Then God said to him in the dream, “Yes, I know you did this with a clear conscience, and so I have kept you from sinning against me. That is why I did not let you touch her. Now return the man’s wife, for he is a prophet, and he will pray for you and you will live. But if you do not return her, you may be sure that you and all who belong to you will die.”

Sometime after the king’s dream ended, he advised his officials of what had happened and summoned Abraham.  What were you thinking? What did I even do to deserve this sort of treatment? Why, just why?

Abraham had an answer, though upon examination it doesn’t really speak well of the Father of Many Nations.

Abraham replied, “I said to myself, ‘There is surely no fear of God in this place, and they will kill me because of my wife.’ Besides, she really is my sister, the daughter of my father though not of my mother; and she became my wife. And when God had me wander from my father’s household, I said to her, ‘This is how you can show your love to me: Everywhere we go, say of me, “He is my brother.”’”

So what was Abraham thinking?

·       Let’s start with there is no fear of God in this place.  I think Abraham had bad intel as the king seemed to know who came to him in his dream and started explaining himself to the God who appeared in his dream.  The fear of the Lord was present at least in that moment.

·       Abraham next tried a technicality.  She really is my sister.  She is my father’s daughter by another mother.  I took her to be my wife.

·       And it’s sort of God’s fault.  He told me to leave my father’s household and go to a land that he would promise to my descendants, but that I would surely be a stranger in now, and then after I got there, there was a famine.  I concocted this plan with my wife because I figured that I was a dead man if anyone knew Sarah was my wife.  She is a looker, you know. I told her that she would need to tell people that I was her brother.

Here’s Tom’s thinking.  This was not the era to be a woman. Lot was ready to throw his daughters to an angry mob of men. Abraham has now twice passed his wife off as his sister thinking it would save his own skin and been caught in his deception.  Yes, she was a half-sister, but when you leave out the part that she also happened to be your wife, it taints the whole story.

So, God punished Abraham… Not exactly.

Once again, we see Abraham profiting from his deception.  Silver, flocks, slaves, and freedom to settle anywhere in the king’s land were given to atone for the perceived sin that Abimelech never committed.

Abraham made out like a bandit.  Where is the moral lesson in this? What can we apply in our lives?

·       If you are the king, be careful about bringing 90-year-old women into your household with hopes of adding them to your harem.  I guess that could be a lesson learned.

·       If you got rich once before playing your wife off as your sister, it might be worth another go.

·       If you are a woman and someone invents a time machine, don’t go back to this time.

Those can’t be our lessons from this chapter.  No!  That just can’t be it.  So what?

God had chosen Abraham for his purpose.  Abraham with all of his flaws was still chosen by God to be the Father of Many Nations.  Abraham did not qualify for this role.  God chose him.

It seems that sometimes God chooses a real screwball.  God told Abraham to keep the faith and walk blamelessly before him.  Abraham was not the model for either charge.

Now, Abraham did do what God told Abimelech that he would do.  He prayed for Abimelech and his household and they were healed.

As we look at this chapter, we might think that the editors could have just left this one out.  What does it add to the story?

Abraham and his wife are in this year of waiting for the promised son.  Apparently, Sarah has not shown any signs of being pregnant.  Abraham decided to move. We don’t see any signs of Abraham setting up the nursery.  It seems that Abraham and Sarah are just going about their lives as usual.

The promised son doesn’t seem to be the central theme in the story.  Didn’t God just visit them?

Abraham will be the Father of Many Nations because God chose him to be the Father of Many Nations.  It was not because Abraham made the best decisions ever.  It was not because Abraham was known for his integrity.  If we read ahead just a little, we see Abraham and King Abimelech making a treaty but Abimelech wants to know that Abraham isn’t going to pull a fast one on him.

Now swear to me here before God that you will not deal falsely with me or my children or my descendants. Show to me and the country where you now reside as a foreigner the same kindness I have shown to you.

King Abimelech knew that God was with Abraham in everything he did, but Abimelech was very cautious about having dealings with this man named Abraham. 

So God was with Abraham, but Abraham didn’t have much to his personal credit.  His wealth, his military victory, and the son promised to him are all from God.

God credited Abraham with righteousness because of his faith but we don’t see that faith manifested in Abraham’s life for a couple more chapters.

We have talked previously about God doing the impossible so we can know it could only be God.

Now, look at Abraham’s life.  On his own, Abraham was a total mess. Without God, he was just a screwball.  He passed his wife off as his sister twice, had a child with Hagar, and asked God to bless Ishmael thinking God couldn’t give Sarah a child, and yet he still has silver, servants, flocks, and is generally wealthy.

It seems that God chose an impossible candidate to be the Father of Many Nations.  Just as Sarah was beyond child-bearing years, so too was Abraham at the very bottom of the list as far as being qualified for such a selection as being the Father of Many Nations.

Perhaps that is so we can see it is God at work.  There were surely more qualified men somewhere on the planet, but God chose Abraham and God did the impossible through him.

There will come a people through whom God will work and reveal himself to the world.

There will come a Savior for a lost world and we know today that he came from the line of Abraham.

They will come through the line of Abraham, a man who is not much to talk about on his own.

So how do we apply this to our lives?

Consider Abraham and consider Paul’s words to the church in Corinth.

Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses.  What a crazy statement, at least in the world’s model.

But the second part of it is what we see in Abraham—God’s power resting on him.  Paul described it as Christ’s power, but it was the power of God being manifest in his weakness.

Let’s not throw in the towel just because we find ourselves numbered among the screwballs of the world.  Let’s be glad that in our weakness, our shortcomings, and even our transgressions, we can know God’s strength.

Don’t go having kids on the side or try to pass your wife off as your sister to save your own hide, but consider all the things in which we just miss the mark and know that is where God’s strength carries us through.

As we have made our way through this story of Abraham, I have reminded you before of some of Paul’s words from his letter to the Romans.

For God has bound everyone over to disobedience so that he may have mercy on them all.

God chose Abraham for his purpose.  Abraham received the mercy of God time and time again.  Abraham lived in the favor of God.

Despite his shortcomings, Abraham knew and lived in the favor of God.

Let us never lose sight that we too live in the favor of God. We see the mercy, forgiveness, grace, and favor of God even in this first book of the Bible.

Thank God for his favor, for without it we would be lost and alone.

Amen.